From The Desk Of The Black Widow.

Confessions of a true love addict
Hi my name is... really not important... but my friends call me the Black Widow (for reasons i shall not reveal right now) and i am addicted to love. I have been a victim of this disease for over 9 years now and been trying to get some type of treatment for it for 2 years... To be quite honest i don't think there is any. I have been to numerous "love doctors" (not to say i have been with different partners hoping to get a cure from one of them just to realize they are as sick as i am or worse, they don't suffer from it at all). I have learned a lot from each of these "doctors". Some have been very optimistic and enthusiastic about the whole thing, giving me tremendous amount of hope (just so later on they could loose it themselves and blame me for it), others have been very pessimistic about it and ended up catching the virus from me. Crazy "doctors" i call them. I had been looking, endlessly, for that one "doctor" that would finally cure me (or make me worse), until a couple of months ago I stopped and though a bit about my entire struggle with this sickness. I discovered some things about myself and about those around me. I had been fighting something that is a part of me and that no matter how hard i try, i was going against myself. This is not a disease, this is a blessing. This being a love addict gives me hope in a world where that word does not exist anymore. This disease I believed to have had, makes me strong and gives me what i need to go on, specially in those times when I almost loose my head. This that i suffer from is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me.

I met a person who believes himself to be rid of this particular illness (after months of being with him and studying his behavior towards me and others like me, i came to the conclusion that he suffers from it as much as the next guy) and he was the one who made me realize how lucky I am to have this virus. would you like to know why I say i am lucky? I can feel. I am blessed because I can feel. I still skip a heart beat whenever I think of that great person who made the biggest difference in my life, I can still say I can fall in love, I can rejoice in the fact that i can cause a reaction in someone, I can make a difference in peoples hearts ad lives, and they can make a difference in mine, I can take a part of their love, their life, with me and they can take a part of mine, and I can grow. And i can be different in a world where everyone wants to be the same. I could be called crazy and a fool for still believing in the impossible, but guess what? I am not alone. I know deep down in your hearts you are as hope-full as I am, because love is not a disease, is the reason we exist, the reason we keep on going, the reason we never give up and the reason we risk everything we are, could become, have or could have just to be with that person ("the one", "our soul mate") even if for a brief moment, and if we are unfortunate enough to loose that person, it would not matter, because we got to be with them at least once. We loved and we were loved even if for a brief moment. And that would make it all worth it.

So even though i started this conversation by saying i suffer from a disease, let me finish it his way: Hi my name is... still not important... my friends call me the black widow and I am a love addict, I am a victim of the biggest, most wonderful blessing God could have ever given us, and I am proud to say i never want to find the cure for it. Would you like to join me in my eternal quest for more victims? If your answer is yes, I am glad you are one too. Embrace it, never deny it and be free, but most of all, be in love, everyday of your life.

Truly and always yours,
The Black Widow.

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